Bitte helfen! Host family letter :)

Hey, Leute… Ich weiß,es gibt schon so unglaublich viele Hostfamily letters hier, aber ich würde mich total freuen, wenn ihr meinen mal lesen und verbessern könntet. Sagt bitte auch, wenn euch etwas vom Inhalt her nicht gefällt. Kritik ist kein Problem :slight_smile:

Dear host family,

you can‘t imagine how long I was sitting in front of the computer, thinking about the perfect beginning of this letter. I wanted to begin with something special, something, you will remember. You see, I know in which way I should start but it’s still not easy to find the right words.

At first, I want to say thank you for giving me the opportunity to live a year abroad. Without you, my dream would never come true!
To make your decision easier I want to give you a little impression about who I am. My name is Teresa and I am an 14-year old girl from Austria. My birhday is on the ******, so when I will come to you, I will be 15.
My family and my friends would describe me as an independent, humorous, helpful and friendly girl. Sometimes I am a bit crazy, and sometimes a little shy.

My dream to go abroad developed about one year ago. At first it was just an idea but in a few months it started to be my dream. I love to get in touch with people from a different culture and with a different point of view. It’s not that I don’t like my life here in Austria, in contrary, I will miss my family and my friends for sure. But I know that the experiences of one year with you will be more than worth leaving my normal home. I hope I will become more self- confident and open- minded during the year and that I can speak a new language fluently and have friends from all over the world.

Now, I want to indroduce my familie. It consists of four people, my mum ****, my dad **** and my 17-year old sister ****. My mum is social worker, my dad electrical engineer, and my sister finishes school this year. My dad doesn’t live at home, because my parents divorced a few years ago. So I just see him biweekly, because I live with my mum and my sister. I also have two cats, and two rabbits. Me and my family get along pretty well most of the time even if we argue sometimes. All in all I have a very good relationship to my family, especially to my sister. We often laught the hole day and we have so much fun with each other.
My mom has lots of work to do, so I often have to help in the household. That’s no problem for me. Of course, sometimes she has to remind me but I always try to help her. I also have to take care of my pets, like feed them.

On Weekends I sometimes do little trips with my family, like going swimming, shopping or just playing card games. I also often meet my friends on weekends and stay overnight. I don’t really have a best friend, but a few good friends, which are a very important part in my life. But sometimes, I am just at home, learn for school and sleep quite long. But all in all, I am an outgoing and adventurous person.

From Monday to Friday, I go to school. It is a secondary school with focus of science. My favourtite subjects are Maths, PE and German. In school, I often help the other students with homework or explain them something, they do not understand, because I am one of the best students in class.

One of my hobbies is doing sports. Sometimes I go running and take part on competitions. I also do other sports, like climbing, swimming and so on. I also really like to do little trips on weekends, like going to the cinema with my friends or something like that. I also play flute since 7 years now. I play about 4 hours a week. Mostly, I really like it, but sometimes it’s a bit exhausting. When I am bored, I watch TV or play computer games. One year ago, I started to bake different cakes and biscuits. I do not only like to bake them, I love to eat them. If you want, I can bake some cakes and cook traditional Austrian food for you in a few months. Another hobby are my pets. When I am bored, I just go to my cats or rabbits and stroke them or play with them. I really love them and I’m sure I will miss them a lot.

As you see, I really like animals and so I am self- imposed vegetarian since 6 years now. I hope this fact doesn’t terrify you. But it is no problem for me, when others eats meat because I think everybody should eat what he or she wants. It is okay, when I have to cook for myself or when I just eat the side dishes. I don’t want you to cook extra menus for me.

In my future, I want to finish school and study on a university. I do not know, what exactly I want to study, but I am very interested in science and jobs, where I can help people.

I hope this letter gave you a little impression of my life and who I am. Finally, I wanted to say that I really hope to hear from you and to see you soon.

Greetings from Austria,
Teresa

Ich hab auf Grammatik und Rechtschreibung korrigiert.
Hier und da auch ein paar Formulierungen und/oder Wiederholungen, die ich nicht sehr gut fand.

Dear host family,

you can‘t imagine how long I was sitting in front of the computer, thinking about the perfect beginning of this letter. I wanted to begin with something special, something, you will remember. You see, I know how I should start but it’s still not easy to find the right words.

At first, I want to thank you for giving me the opportunity to live a year abroad. Without you, my dream would never come true!
To make your decision easier I want you to get an idea of who I am. My name is Teresa and I am a 14-year old girl from Austria. My birthday is on the ******, so on the exchange I will be already 15.
My family and my friends would describe me as an independent, humorous, helpful and friendly girl. Sometimes I am a bit crazy, and sometimes a little shy.

My dream to go abroad developed about one year ago. At first it was just an idea, but in a few months it started to be my dream. I love to get in touch with people from different cultures and with different point of views. It’s not that I don’t like my life here in Austria; if anything I will miss my family and friends for sure. But I know that the experiences of one year with you will be more than worth leaving my normal home. I hope I will become more self-confident and open-minded during the year, that I can speak a new language fluently and have friends from all over the world.

Now, I want to introduce my family. It consists of four people, my mum ****, my dad **** and my 17-year old sister ****. My mum is a social worker, my dad an electrical engineer, and my sister will graduate school this year. My dad doesn’t live at home, because my parents got divorced a few years ago. So I just see him biweekly, because I live with my mum and my sister. I also have two cats, and two rabbits. Me and my family get along pretty well most of the time even if we argue sometimes. All in all I have a very good relationship with my family, especially with my sister. We often laugh the whole day and we have so much fun together.
My mom has a lot of work to do, so I often have to help in the household. That’s no problem for me. Of course, sometimes she has to remind me, but I always try to help her. I also have to take care of my pets, like feed them.

On Weekends I sometimes do little trips with my family, like going swimming, shopping or just playing card games. I also often meet my friends on weekends, go to the cinema and stay overnight. I don’t really have a best friend, but a few good friends, which are a very important part in my life. But sometimes, I am just at home, learn for school and sleep quite long. But all in all, I am an outgoing and adventurous person.

From Monday to Friday, I go to school. It is a secondary school with focus on science. My favorite subjects are Mathematics, PE and German. In school, I often help the other students with homework or explain them something, they do not understand, because I am one of the best students in class.

One of my hobbies is doing sports. Sometimes I go running and take part in competitions. I also do other sports, like climbing, swimming and so on. I also play flute for 7 years now. I play about 4 hours a week. Mostly, I really like it, but sometimes it’s a bit exhausting. When I am bored, I watch TV or play computer games. One year ago, I started to bake different cakes and biscuits. I do not only like to bake them, I love to eat them. If you want, I can bake some cakes and cook traditional Austrian food for you in a few months. Another hobby is my pets. When I am bored, I just go to my cats or rabbits and stroke them or play with them. I really love them and I’m sure I will miss them a lot.

As you see, I really like animals and so I am self- imposed vegetarian for 6 years now. I hope this fact doesn’t terrify you. But it is no problem for me, when others eat meat because I think everybody should eat what he or she wants. It is okay, when I have to cook for myself or when I just eat the side dishes. I don’t want you to cook extra menus for me.

In my future, I want to finish school and study at a university. I do not know, what exactly I want to study, but I am very interested in science and jobs, where I can help people.

I hope this letter gave an idea of my life and who I am. Finally, I wanted to say that I really hope to hear from you and to see you soon.

Greetings from Austria,
Teresa

Danke für deine Antwort, hilft mir total :slight_smile:

Hallo!

Ich hatte schon vor einigen Tagen mit der Korrektur begonnen und konnte sie erst jetzt fertigstellen. Wie ich eben gesehen habe, hat inzwischen schon jemand anderes deinen Text angeschaut und korrigiert. Vielleicht helfen dir meine grammatikalischen Korrekturen und Vorschläge auch ein wenig, du kannst sie ja mal anschauen, wenn du magst.

Ich persönlich finde einen solchen Text flüssiger, wenn man hauptsächlich Abkürzungen („Im" statt "I am", "dont“ statt „do not“, „it`s“ statt „it is“ und ähnliches) verwendet. Aber das ist sicher Geschmackssache, darum habe ich das auch nicht geändert.

Viele Grüße und schon mal ein schönes Austauschjahr!

Dear host family,

at first, I would like to introduce myself to you. My name is Teresa and I am an 14-year-old girl from Austria. My birhday is on ****, so when I will come to you, I will be 15 years old. My family and my friends would describe me as an independent, humorous, helpful and friendly girl. Sometimes I am a bit crazy and sometimes a little bit shy.

I have been dreaming of going abroad for about a year now. I love to get in touch with people from a different culture and with a different point of view. It’s not that I don’t like my life here in Austria, I will miss my family and my friends for sure. But I know that going abroad will be more than worth leaving home. I hope that I will become more self- confident and open- minded during my time in (…) and will be able to speak (…) fluently.

Now I would like to introduce my family to you. I live together with my mum *** and my 17-year-old sister ****. My mum is a social worker and my sister will graduate school this year. My dad, an electric engineer, doesn’t live at home anymore as my parents got divorced a few years ago. So I just meet him biweekly. All in all, I have a very good relationship to my family, especially to my sister, as we have so much fun together.
My mom has a lot of work, so I often help out at home. That’s no problem for me. Of course, sometimes she has to remind me but I always try to help her.

During the weekends I enjoy go swimming, go shopping or playing cards with my family. I also often meet my friends to go to the movies or stay overnight. I don’t really have a best friend but a few good friends who are a very important part of my life. All in all, I am an outgoing and adventurous person. I also enjoy doing sports. Sometimes I go running and take part on competitions. I also do other sports, like climbing or swimming.

From monday to friday, I attend a high school with a focus on science. My favourite subjects are maths, PE and German. I often help other students with their homework or explain something to them because I`m one of the best students in class.
I have been piping for seven years now. Most of the time I really enjoy it but sometimes it’s a bit exhausting. When I am bored I watch TV or play computer games. One year ago I started to bake different cakes and biscuits. I do not only like to bake them, I love to eat them, too. If you want me to, I can bake some cakes and cook traditional Austrian food for you. Another hobby of mine are my pets, two cats and two rabbits. When I am bored I enjoy stroking them or playing with them. I really love them and I’m sure I will miss them a lot.

As you see, I really like animals and so I have been vegetarian for six years now. I hope this fact doesn’t terrify you. It is no problem for me when the people around me eat meat because I think everybody should eat what he or she wants to eat. It is okay when I have to cook for myself or when I just eat the side dishes. I don’t want you to cook extra menus for me.

Later on I would like to study at university. I do not know exactly what I want to study but I am very interested in science and jobs where I can help other people.

I hope this letter gave you a little impression of my life and of who I am. Finally, I wanted to say that I really hope to hear from you and see you soon.

Greetings from Austria,
Teresa