Hey :),
Das ist mein erster Beitrag hier und obwohl ich somit eigentlich noch nicht wirklich jemanden geholfen hab bitte ich euch um hilfe. Mir ist das Austauschjahr sehr wichtig wie wahrscheinlich jedem hier . Und ich würde es toll finden wenn jemand meinen Brief für die Gastfamilie korrigieren und Änderungsvorschläge machen würde.
Außerdem ist der Brief ziemlich… durcheinander. Jeder Absatz stellt eine Frage dar und das ist sehr durcheinander gewürfelt. Außerdem habe ich Probleme damit meinen Wohnort zu beschreiben ohne dessen Namen zu nennen. Vielleicht könnte mir da auch jemand helfen? Ich bedanke mich schonmal im vorraus
Dear host family,
first I’m glad that you give me the chance to spend a year with you in which I can collect new experiences and culture impressions.
My name is Marvin and I’m at the age of 15. I’m German and have short blond hair, blue eyes. I would describe me as creative, intelligent, musicale, open-minded, friendly and technical interested.
My activities on the weekend are reading books especially books which handle about fantasy stories in the middle-age, going to the cinema if there are good films, hang up with my friends and play with my guitar.
When I hang up with my friends we are going together to the cinema or swimming pool, playing guitar or drive together around the city.
Like nearly every youth in my age I don’t have any career plans yet but my special areas of interest are Computer, Art and Music maybe I find something which unite this interests.
The favorite subjects and school activities which I enjoy are especially art and music. I like it when one can switch off one’s head and decontrol your subconscious. There will be produced the best results and one feel satisfied and free after this brain storming. Beside art and music I like it when one can experiments in physic, chemise and biology instead of theory.
I want to be an exchange student because I want to see everything in the world. Its incredible how many different cultures there are and it’s a personally objective from me to meet as many as I could. Beside I hope to gain new impressions about the USA, the people who live there and maybe get a little bit more independent. I’m willing to make this exchange a new and good experience on both sides, represent my home country Germany and answer open questions about it.
My family consists of four people: My Mum, my Dad, my Sister and me. The relationship with my parents is good. We get along well with us and we like to attempt something together. I would describe the relationship with my sister as good but not as so good like the relationship with my parents. Sometimes we argue with each other but the other time we are the best friends.
My responsibilities in the family are taking care of our two dogs and attend to our household (like mow the grass or clear out the dishwasher).
Im looking forward to spend a year in your family,
Sincerly,
Marvin
Hey, also so im gesamten find ich den Brief eig ziemlich gut, aber n paar Fehler sind da drin. Andere können das bestimmt besser berichtigen, aber ich hab mal angefangen…
Dear host family,
thank you for taking me as an exchange student. I’m really excited to learn the language and something about the culture and the life in the US.
My name is Marvin and I’m 15 years old. I’m German and have short blond hair, blue eyes. I would describe me as creative, intelligent, musicale, open-minded, friendly and technical interested.
My activities on the weekend are reading fantasy books , going to the cinema if there are good films, hanging out with my friends and playing guitar.
When I hang out with my friends we are going
to the cinema or to the swimming pool, playing guitar or drive around the city.
Like nearly every youth in my age I don’t have any plans for the future yet but my special areas of interest are Computer, Art and Music maybe I find something which unite this interests.
The favorite subjects and school activities which I enjoy are especially art and music. I like it when one can switch off one’s head and decontrol your subconscious. There will be produced the best results and one feel satisfied and free after this brain storming. Beside art and music I like it when one can experiments in physic, chemise and biology instead of theory.
I want to be an exchange student because I want to see everything in the world. Its incredible how many different cultures there are and it’s a personally objective from me to meet as many as I could. Beside I hope to gain new impressions about the USA, the people who live there and maybe get a little bit more independent. I’m willing to make this exchange a new and good experience on both sides, represent my home country Germany and answer open questions about it.
My family consists of four people: My Mum, my Dad, my Sister and me. The relationship with my parents is good. We get along well with us and we like to attempt something together. I would describe the relationship with my sister as good but not as so good like the relationship with my parents. Sometimes we argue with each other but the other time we are the best friends.
My responsibilities in the family are taking care of our two dogs and attend to our household (like mow the grass or clear out the dishwasher).
Im looking forward to spend a year in your family,
Sincerly,
Marvin
Hey!
Also ich hab mal deinen letter kopiert und ein paar sachen verbessert! Vom Inhalt würde ich das mit music, arts und so (das hast du sehr oft erwähnt. als activity, what you do with friends, career plans) alles in eins zusammenfassen. Mehr aus deinem Alltag wäre auch nicht schlecht. Was macht dich aus??
die beschreibung könnte auch auf vieele andere passen! Also beschreib das dann auch!
warum du ein auslandsjahr machen willst ist echt gut!!
Das sollte jetzt alles keine kritik gegen dich sein sondern dir helfen! (Ich hoffe ich konnte…)
lg
Dear host family(,)
First I’m glad that you give me the chance to spend a year with you to collect new experiences and culture impressions.
My name is Marvin and I’m 15. I’m German and have short blond hair, blue eyes (Willst du das wirklich schreiben? Die sehen ja ohnehin Fotos und dann kommt das vielleicht so ein bisschen Nazi an, weil „reine Arier blond und blauäugig sind“. Also nicht dass du einer bist, aber in Amerika könnte das so verstanden werden, weil viele ohnehin denken alle Deutschen sind Nazis.). I am creative, intelligent, musical, open-minded, friendly and technical interested.
My freetime includes reading books especially books which are about fantasy in the middle-ages, going to the cinema, hang out with my friends and play the guitar.
When I hang out with my friends we are going together to the cinema or swimming pool, playing guitar or drive together around the city.(Das hast du eigentlich im Absatz davor schon erwähnt, deswegen würde ich das gleich davor schon reinbringen. Einfach: going to cinema or playing the guitar with my friends.)
Like nearly every youth in my age I don’t have any career plans yet, but my special areas of interests are Computer, Art and Music maybe I find something which unite this interests.(Das hast du eigentlich auch schon erwähnt, also eher weglassen.)
My favorite subjects and school activities are especially art and music. I like it when one can get away from it all(switch off wird nicht unbedingt für Menschen benutzt) and decontrol your subconscious(Was willst du hier sagen? Das ist nicht verständlich.). There will be produced the best results. You feel satisfied and free after this brain storming. Beside art and music I like it when you can experiment in physic, chemistry and biology instead of theory.
I want to be an exchange student because I want to see everything in the world. It’s incredible how many different cultures there are and it’s a personal objective for me to get to know as many as I could. Besides I hope to gain new impressions about the USA, the people who live there and maybe get a little bit more independent. I’m willing to make this exchange a new and good experience on both sides, represent my home country Germany and answer open questions about it.(Der Abschnitt ist aber rihctig gut!!!sollte aber lieber ans Ende.)
My family consists of four people: My Mum, my Dad, my Sister and me (Namen angeben? und vielleicht Alter?). The relationship with my parents is good. We get along well with each other and we like to attempt something together (for example?). I would describe the relationship with my sister as well as good. Sometimes we argue with each other, but the other time we are the best friends. (was macht ihr zusammen?)
My responsibilities in the family are taking care of our two dogs (Namen? short description) and help to keep the house (like mow the lawn or clear out the dishwasher).
I’m looking forward to spend a year as a family member of yours.
Sincerly, (Ich finde das ein bisschen zu formell. Die sind wahrscheinlich deine zukünftige family)
Marvin
Nunja. Das ist es was mich ausmacht :). Nicht wirklich viel. Ich liebe einfach die Musik, bin fröhlich, zeichne gern und will oft einfach was unternehmen mit meinen Freunden.
Ich hab den Brief jetzt verbessert und stell ihn nochmal online und danke für die Hilfen bisher.
Dear host family,
First I’m glad that you give me the chance to spend a year with you to collect new experiences and culture impressions.
My name is Marvin and I’m a 15 year old German. I am creative, intelligent, musical, open-minded, friendly and technical interested.
I live in northern Lower Saxony in agrarian (ländlichen?) village. Its pretty calm there and if you want to do something you must go into the next town.
My freetime includes reading fantasy books, going to the cinema, hang out with my friends, play the guitar and drive around the city.
Like nearly every youth in my age I don’t have any career plans yet, maybe I find something in this exchange year which unite my interests.
My favorite subjects and school activities are especially art and music. I like it when one can get away from it all and concentrate only on your painting/instrument. There will be produced the best results. You feel satisfied and free after this “brain storming”. Beside art and music I like it when you can experiment in physic, chemistry and biology instead of theory.
My family consists of four people: My 43 year old mum Britta, my 47 year old dad Martin, my 15 year old sister Ann-Katrin and me. The relationship with my parents is good. We get along well with each other and we like to attempt something together for example playing board games or going to an amusement park. I would describe the relationship with my sister as well as good. Sometimes we argue with each other, but the other time we are the best friends. When I have a problem I can always talk about it with her.
My responsibilities in the family are taking care of our two dogs (Idefix and Gismo two Westhighland Terrier, Idefix is grown up with us and is 12 years old and Gismo is our new dog he’s 1 year old and very playful) and help to keep the house (like mow the lawn or clear out the dishwasher).
I want to be an exchange student because I want to see everything in the world. It’s incredible how many different cultures there are and it’s a personal objective for me to get to know as many as I could. Besides I hope to gain new impressions about the USA, the people who live there and maybe get a little bit more independent. I’m willing to make this exchange a new and good experience on both sides, represent my home country Germany and answer open questions about it.
I’m looking forward to spend a year as a family member of yours.
Jetzt hab ich glatt zweimal geantwortet :/. Jedes Forum funktioniert anders
Nunja. Das ist es was mich ausmacht :). Nicht wirklich viel. Ich liebe einfach die Musik, bin fröhlich, zeichne gern und will oft einfach was unternehmen mit meinen Freunden.
Ich hab den Brief jetzt verbessert und stell ihn nochmal online und danke für die Hilfen bisher.
Dear host family,
First I’m glad that you give me the chance to spend a year with you to collect new experiences and culture impressions.
My name is Marvin and I’m a 15 year old German. I am creative, intelligent, musical, open-minded, friendly and technical interested.
I live in northern Lower Saxony in agrarian (ländlichen?) village. Its pretty calm there and if you want to do something you must go into the next town.
My freetime includes reading fantasy books, going to the cinema, hang out with my friends, play the guitar and drive around the city.
Like nearly every youth in my age I don’t have any career plans yet, maybe I find something in this exchange year which unite my interests.
My favorite subjects and school activities are especially art and music. I like it when one can get away from it all and concentrate only on your painting/instrument. There will be produced the best results. You feel satisfied and free after this “brain storming”. Beside art and music I like it when you can experiment in physic, chemistry and biology instead of theory.
My family consists of four people: My 43 year old mum Britta, my 47 year old dad Martin, my 15 year old sister Ann-Katrin and me. The relationship with my parents is good. We get along well with each other and we like to attempt something together for example playing board games or going to an amusement park. I would describe the relationship with my sister as well as good. Sometimes we argue with each other, but the other time we are the best friends. When I have a problem I can always talk about it with her.
My responsibilities in the family are taking care of our two dogs (Idefix and Gismo two Westhighland Terrier, Idefix is grown up with us and is 12 years old and Gismo is our new dog he’s 1 year old and very playful) and help to keep the house (like mow the lawn or clear out the dishwasher).
I want to be an exchange student because I want to see everything in the world. It’s incredible how many different cultures there are and it’s a personal objective for me to get to know as many as I could. Besides I hope to gain new impressions about the USA, the people who live there and maybe get a little bit more independent. I’m willing to make this exchange a new and good experience on both sides, represent my home country Germany and answer open questions about it.
I’m looking forward to spend a year as a family member of yours.
Mal ganz abgesehen vom Inhalt und der Formulierung (die ich sehr gut finde ;)) kommt es immer besser alles auszuschreiben, d.h. anstatt I’m I am usw. - ist einfach höflicher.
soo, ich hab auch noch ein paar verbesserungsvorschläge. einmal: best greetings, mmmh. kann man bestimmt sagen, aber ich habs jetzt noch nicht gehört. ‚Yours sincerely‘ ist eher ziemlich bekannt und auch so allgemein verwendet.
dann statt collect, gain new experiences.
ländlich einfahc weglassen und little oder so sagen. magst du es auf dem land zu wohnen? wenn ja, warum? schreib das doch auch
dann play guitar ohne the dazwischen… der nächste satz dann: like many other people at my age i …
danach versteh ich nicht soo ganz, was du meinst. den satz mit musik und kunst und so find ich toll! aber meinst du dann danach, dass du dann wieder produktiver wirst oder dass du das am besten kannst?? und ‚brain storming‘ ist sowas wie mind map und so, kennst du das? vielleicht solltest du da stattdessen abwechslung nehmen oder so…
und dann: when you do experiments in physics, chemistry and bio- so something more practical instead of studying the theory of it.
amusement park ist glaub ich eher theme park…
die beschreibung für auslandsjahr find ich auch hammer gut ich denke ganz genau wie du hahha. nur hast du nicht erklärt, warum du genau in die usa möchtest und nicht nach ecuador, frankreich oder halt irgendwo anders hin auf der welt…
haha. das ist jetzt alles vielleicht ein bisschen durcheinander, aber vielleicht konnt ich dir ein bisschen helfen freu dich aufs jahr tust du wahrshcienlich ohnehine heheh
Ich danke dir Lea du hattest mit der einen oder anderen Sache recht. Ich hoffe meine Gastfamilie findet den Satz über das Dorf wo ich wohne genauso witzig wie ich .
Dear host family,
First I’m glad that you give me the chance to spend a year with you to gain new experiences and culture impressions.
My name is Marvin and I’m a 15 year old German. I am creative, intelligent, musical, open-minded, friendly and technical interested.
I live in northern Lower Saxony in a small village. It is pretty calm there and if you want to do something you must go into the next town. Often it is very boring there but if you need rest, it is perfect!
My freetime includes reading fantasy books, going to the cinema, hang out with my friends, play guitar and drive around the city.
Like nearly every youth in my age I don’t have any career plans yet, maybe I find something in this exchange year which unite my interests.
My favorite subjects and school activities are especially art and music. I like it when one can get away from it all and concentrate only on your painting/instrument. There will be produced the best results. You feel satisfied and free after this method for concentrating. Beside art and music I like it when you do something more practical in physic, chemistry and biology instead of studying the theory of it.
My family consists of four people: My 43 year old mum Britta, my 47 year old dad Martin, my 15 year old sister Ann-Katrin and me. The relationship with my parents is good. We get along well with each other and we like to attempt something together for example playing board games or going to an theme park. I would describe the relationship with my sister as well as good. Sometimes we argue with each other, but the other time we are the best friends. When I have a problem I can always talk about it with her.
My responsibilities in the family are taking care of our two dogs (Idefix and Gismo two Westhighland Terrier, Idefix is grown up with us and is 12 years old and Gismo is our new dog he’s 1 year old and very playful) and help to keep the house (like mow the lawn or clear out the dishwasher).
I want to be an exchange student because I want to see everything in the world. It’s incredible how many different cultures there are and it’s a personal objective for me to get to know as many as I could. Besides I hope to gain new impressions about the USA, the people who live there, improve my English skills and maybe get a little bit more independent. I’m willing to make this exchange a new and good experience on both sides, represent my home country Germany and answer open questions about it.
I’m looking forward to spend a year as a family member of yours.
. Und ich würde es toll finden wenn jemand meinen Brief für die Gastfamilie korrigieren und Änderungsvorschläge machen würde.
.