Ist mein Gastfamilienbrief grammatikalisch korrekt?

Dear host family,

first of all I want to thank you for reading this letter. In this letter I want to introduce myself as well as my family and friends.

My name is XXX and I’m 15 years old, by the time I’ll arrive in the US I will be 16. I live in XXX which is a suburb of Hamburg. I live in a townhouse with a small garden at the river Elbe. I can see container- and cruise ships out of my room. In my opinion, especially cruise ships are interesting. Because of that, I read books and magazines with facts about cruise ships. I’ve been on 5 journeys with cruise ships.

My school is XXX, a school with only a few students. The school is quite close to my home so I go there by bike.

I like school because I’m interested in learning new things. My favorite subjects are English, Spanish, German, Politics & Economy, Theatre and Geography. I’m also a member of the first aid team of our school. In the first aid team, we take care of sick students or students who have injuries. This is a lot of fun. In our school we have NWE (a subject where we experiment) and we participate with our project in a science competition called “Jugend forscht” which is the biggest science competition in Germany. Even though I don’t like sciences I made a first prize at the state competition. I like to participate in competitions and I would like to participate in knowledge or society competitions.

To come to my family: I live together with my parents, unfortunately I don’t have siblings. I have two mice and I often play with the neighbors’ dogs. In the past, I had rabbits and guinea pigs.

I have a good relationship with my family. My parents support me whenever they can. I see my grandparents regularly and I go on holidays with my cousins as well. My family is quite important to me.

My mother works as a priest in a hospital. She only works half day and I spend a lot of time with her.

My father works as a manager in the storehouse section. He works quite a lot, but I spend some time with him on the weekend.

I also have lots of fun with my friends. We talk and laugh a lot together, go shopping, cook or bake.

I like reading in my free time as well. I like to do a lot with friends and family, but I also need a bit of silence once a day.

In my free time I play the cello and the piano. If there is time I do sports like inline skating or dancing. During the winter holidays I go skiing. Beside reading German books I enjoy reading English and Spanish books as well. I love to learn foreign languages. Therefore, I also learn French with a private teacher. I love to travel and especially to plan journeys even if it’s not possible to do them all.

I would like to be an exchange student because I want to meet new people, gain experience, get to know the American culture and learn a lot of new things. I want to go to the US because the people are extremely friendly and hospitable. I would like to experience the American school spirit as well. I love to speak English and because of that I can’t wait to speak English all day long. My mother stayed in India when she was young and enjoyed it. I’m not going a year abroad to travel around, I’m going to a country to get to know their everyday life.

I already have some international experience. In the summer holidays in 2014 I stayed 3 weeks in Ireland. I lived with a host family and we had fun together. I really enjoyed this time, because of that I decided to spend a longer time in a foreign country.

Thank you very much for your hospitality.

XXX

Habe ich Grammatikfehler gemacht? Wenn ja könntet ihr sie bitte korrigieren ?Meine Orga meinte ich solle 1,5 bis 2 Seiten schreiben. Kennt ihr noch Themen die fehlen?

Danke

beitragabfolgen.gif Auf diesen Beitrag gibt es 2 direkte Antworten:
vom 20.1.2015 18:30
S. Z.

...

Ich würde noch etwas mehr über deine Freunde schreiben, wie sie heißen und was ihr zusammen unternehmt :)

Hostfamiliy Brief

Hey!
Ich bin auch bei TravelWorks, geh aber 2015/16 und hab noch nicht mal mit dem Brief angefangen, also lass dir ruhig noch Zeit, du hast ja genug davon. Ich hab mir den Brief jetzt mal gründlich durchgelesen und ein bisschen umgeschrieben, also so wie ich den schreiben würde. Denk jetzt nicht du musst ihn genau so schreiben, aber ich hoffe, ich kann dir trotzdem ein bisschen helfen. Und wenn du fragen hast, frag ruhig ;)

Dear host family,

first of all I want to thank you for reading this letter. In this letter I want to introduce myself as well as my family and friends.

My name is XXX and I’m 15 years old, by the time I’ll arrive in the US I will be 16. I live in a townhouse with a small garden in XXX which is a suburb of Hamburg. Out of the window in my room I can see container- and cruise ships. In my opinion especially cruise ships are interesting and that’s why read books and magazines with facts about cruise ships. I’ve been on 5 journeys with cruise ships.

My school “XXX” is located very close to my house so i can go there by bike. It’s got only a few students, but I like it because I’m interested in learning new things. My favorite subjects are English, Spanish, German, Politics & Economy, Theatre and Geography. Also I am a member of my school’s first aid team, where we help and take care of sick or injured students. That’s a lot of fun (because it makes me happy if I can help someone).
In our school we have NWE (a subject where we experiment) and we participate with our project in a science competition called “Jugend forscht” which is the biggest science competition in Germany. Even though I don’t like science I won the first prize at the state competition. I like to participate in competitions and I would like to participate in knowledge or society competitions.

One of the most important things in my life is my family. I live with my parents but unfortunately I don’t have any siblings. I have two mice and I often play with the neighbors’ dogs. In the past, I had rabbits and guinea pigs. I have a good relationship with my family. My parents support me whenever they can. I see my grandparents regularly and I go on holidays with my cousins as well. My family is quite important to me.

My mother works as a priest in a hospital but she does that only half-time. I love spending time with her.
My father works as a manager in the storehouse section. He works quite a lot, but at the weekend I can spend my free time with him too.

I also have lots of fun with my friends. We talk and laugh a lot together, go shopping, cook or bake. (hier würd ich noch mehr schreiben)

I like to do something with friends and family, but I also need a bit of silence once a day. Reading is perfect for that. I don’t mind if the books are in German, English or Spanish because I enjoy reading them all. I love to learn foreign languages. Therefore, I also learn French with a private teacher. I love to travel and especially to plan journeys even if it’s not possible to do them all. In my free time I play the cello and the piano. If there is time I do sports like inline skating or dancing. During the winter holidays I go skiing.
I already have some international experience. In the summer holidays in 2014 I stayed 3 weeks in Ireland. I lived with a host family and we had fun together. I really enjoyed this time, because of that I decided to spend a longer time in a foreign country.
Also my mom told me a lot about the time she spent in India when she was young. I was impressed of what she had experienced, what she had learnt how independent she was. That was what inspired me to take the chance and go on an exchange year too.
I would like to be an exchange student because I want to meet new people, gain experience, get to know the American culture and learn a lot of new things. I want to go to the US because the people are extremely friendly and hospitable. I would like to experience the American school spirit as well. I love to speak English and so I can’t wait to speak English all day long. I’m not going a year abroad to travel around, I want to go to a country and get to know their everyday life.


Thank you very much for your hospitality.

XXX


Liebe Grüße, Denise Smily

Diskussionsübersicht
20.1.2015
Levke S. USA TravelWorks 2016/17
Ist mein Gastfamilienbrief grammatikalisch korrekt?
20.1.2015
S. Z.
X Schließen
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