host-family letter. bitte um verbesserung etc.

Hey leute, hab endlich meinen hostfamily brief fertig.
bitte um korrektur, kritik und vorschläge.
danke im vorraus :slight_smile:

Dear host family,

First of all I want to thank you for reading my letter and spending time on getting to know me better. We don’t know each other yet, so I’ll try to describe me, my life in Germany and the people around me.
My name is Denis Pota, I’m 16 years old and I will turn 17 on September 12th. I’d describe myself as an open-minded, spontaneous, sportive , funny and helping guy.

Before I moved with my family to STADT, a town with 33,000 inhabitants and near STADT and not far from STADT, we had lived in my native town STADT, Germany.
My family consists of my dad NAME (ALTER), my mum NAME (ALTER), my brother NAME (ALTER) and my little dog Pumba (3). My father works as an executive of an international building company, my mum works as a secretary and my brother is attending at the same secondary school as I am. The relationship between my family and me is a very good one. With my father I can go playing squash, football etc., with my mother I can talk about everything and because the not big age difference with my brother we sometimes go out together. Helping in the household is totally normal for me. My brother and I have so set the table, load and unload the dishwasher and keep our room tidy and because my parents are from Hungary and they sometimes have to go to there in the school time, my brother and I have also to cook for ourselves.

Beside my family are my friends the most important persons in my life. I do not have a real best friend, but many really good friends, which I know for very long. I can talk to them, when I have troubles and laugh with them. We play soccer, watch movies or just hang out together. On the weekends we go out in the evening, go to friend’s parties or go to the nearby lake during the summertime.

However, beside my friends I also have some other interests like technique. I design homepages for my friends, edit and create pictures with Photoshop but also sometimes edit videos. Beside computers, I love sport. Earlier I was in a swimming team, where I was the best breaststroke swimmer in my age group. Unfortunately, I had to give up swimming because the swimming trainings got harder and school became more important to me but I still like swimming in summer. Three times a week I go to a Fitness Club where I do weight training with some friends of mine and once a week I have football training. I also love snow skiing, where I go to with my friends every year for already five years now. Beside these things I also go playing Basketball with my friends or playing Volleyball in summer. One of my hobbies is also playing the piano which I’ve been learning for three years now.

I am now attending the 10th grade of a secondary school and I really like going there to school, because I have found many new friends and even the subjects are good. Particularly I like going there, ‘cause we travel a lot such as to Austria, France, Poland etc.

The subjects I like best are English, Chemistry and Sport. Beside English, I learn French and due to my parents background I also speak Hungarian.
At the moment I don’t have any career plans yet, because I think that I will still change myself, particularly while and after my exchange program. I can only tell by now, that I want to take part in Work & Travel to Australia after finishing school. Afterwards I am going to study, but exactly what I don’t know yet.

You surely will ask yourself, why I want to be an exchange student. I thought this is a great opportunity to get to know a new culture, new people, new experiences and a new language. It’s not that I don’t like my home here in Germany, in the opposite, for sure I’ll miss my family, my friends, and also a few things that always seemed to be naturally to me. But I believe the experiences I’ll have in America will be more than worth to leave my usual home for a year.

So I hope to hear from you and even more to be a part of your family for a year.
I’m looking forward to getting to know you.

Yours, Denis

wow, beeindruckendes english und authentische wortwahl, schon vor dem Trip ^^
ich versuch mal die kleinen fehler die ich finde (oder glaube gefunden zu haben) aufzuzeigen:

Dear host family,

First of all I want to thank you for reading my letter and spending time on getting to know me better. We don’t know each other yet, so I’ll try to describe me, my life in Germany and the people around me.
My name is Denis Pota, I’m 16 years old and I will turn 17 on September 12th. I’d describe myself as an open-minded, spontaneous, sportive , funny and helping guy.

Before I moved with my family to STADT, a town with 33,000 inhabitants and near STADT and not far from STADT, we had lived in my native town STADT, Germany.
My family consists of my dad NAME (ALTER), my mum NAME (ALTER), my brother NAME (ALTER) and my little dog Pumba (3). My father works as an executive of an international building company, my mum works as a secretary and my brother is attending at the same secondary school as I am. The relationship between my family and me is a very good one. With my father I can PLAY (reicht hier voellig aus) squash, football etc., with my mother I can talk about everything and because OF the SMALL ( :wink: )age difference with my brother we sometimes go out together. Helping in the household is totally normal for me. My brother and I have so set the table, load and unload the dishwasher and keep our room tidy and because my parents are from Hungary and they sometimes have to go to there DURING school time, my brother and I ALSO have to cook for ourselves.

Beside my family, my friends ARE the most important persons in my life. I do not have a real best friend, but many really good friends, (Euhm, which ist fuer objekte, ich bin mir aber nicht sicher ob hier whom oder who hin gehoert) I know for A very long TIME. I can talk to them, when I have troubles and laugh with them. We play soccer, watch movies or just hang out together. On the weekends we go out in the evening, go to friend’s parties or go to the nearby lake during the summertime.

However, beside my friends I also have some other interests like technique. I design homepages for my friends, edit and create pictures with Photoshop but also sometimes edit videos. Beside computers, I love sport. Earlier I was in a swimming team, where I was the best breaststroke swimmer in my age group. Unfortunately, I had to give up swimming because the swimming trainings got harder and school became more important to me but I still like swimming in summer. Three times a week I go to a Fitness Club where I do weight training with some friends of mine and once a week I have SOCCER (Oder wirklich „american“ football? ) training. I also love TO GO skiing. I DO IT with my friends every year for already five years now. Beside these things I also PLAY (regelmaessigkeit) Basketball with my friends or PLAY (same here) Volleyball in summer. One of my hobbies is playing the piano which I’ve been learning for three years now.

I am now attending the 10th grade of a secondary school and I really like going there to school, because I have found many new friends and even the subjects are good. Particularly I like going there, ‘cause we travel a lot such as to Austria, France, Poland etc. (ehm, ich wuerde sagen: " In particular I like the trips we’re doing with the school, like visiting Austria, France, Poland or other european countries)

The subjects I like best are English, Chemistry and Sport. Besides English, I learn French and due to my parents background I also speak Hungarian.
I don’t have any career plans yet(1mal zeit reicht… entweder at the moment oder yet), because I think that I will still change myself, particularly while and after my exchange program. I can only tell by now, that I want to take part in Work & Travel to Australia after finishing school. Afterwards I am going to study,but exactly what I don’t know yet.

You surely will ask yourself, why I want to be an exchange student. I THINK this is a great opportunity to get to know a new culture, new people, new experiences and a new language. It’s not that I don’t like my home here in Germany, in the opposite, for sure I’ll miss my family, my friends, and also a few things that always seemed to be naturally to me. But I believe the experiences I’ll have in America will be more than worth to leave my usual home for a year.

So I hope to hear from you and even more to be a part of your family for a year.
I’m looking forward to getting to know you.

Yours, Denis

:+1:

hay… also auf jedenfall danke :stuck_out_tongue: werd auf jedenfall die sachen verbessern :slight_smile: