Hilfe beim „Dear family letter“, bitte!

Hay Leute!
Ich habe vor einigen Tagen meinen „Dear family letter“ zurück geschickt bekommen, weil ich etwas vom Schützenverein drin stehen hatte (mögen die Amis anscheinend nicht, wegen Amokläufen und so) und dann war er zu kurz. Ich habe aber keinerlei Gedanken mehr auf Vorrat, die ich da einbringen könnte! Bitte helf mir und gebt mir ein paar Gedankenstützen, was noch fehlt, bzw. noch eingebaut werden kann!

Dear host family,
First of all, I want to thank you for welcoming me in your family and for giving me the chance to have a look into the American way of life, to learn more about American lifestyle, your culture and of course, your language!

My name is Sascha Schell. I’m 16 years old and I live in a historical and touristical town called Monschau situated in North Rhine-Westphalia (near Aix-la-Chapelle) in the western part of Germany, near Belgium and the Netherlands. Monschau is an old medieval town with lot of restaurants, hotels and wonderful old houses made in wooden truss. A town almost visited by American, European and even Asian people.
Spending a year in America has been my dream for many years, since a informative meeting at our school about highschool years happened. At this, I heard some field reports from former highschool year students and I was very fascinated of everything they talked about. Back home, I looked for information about the USA in the internet and in some encyclopedias. Now, I’m very fascinated of the country and I want to get to know more about the culture there. I’m looking forward to try new things and making experiences for my life. I want to become more self-confident and self-employed. But I’m also a little bit nervous.
To get to know me better I am going to tell you something about me, my family and my life in Germany:
I am 1.84 m tall and as you can see at the photo I have red hair and green eyes.
I live with my family in a nice house with a big garden with a wonderful view at the “Monschau-valley”, all together with my 41 years old father who is manager for eleven years now in his own little family hotel, which belonged earlier to my grand-parents for 40 years long. My mother is 38 years old and is housewife for the moment and helps sometimes in our hotel. My 19 years old brother does an education for metalworker and my 6 years old sister is in grade 2 at the basic school.

We all have a close relationship. If someone has a problem he can talk to everyone of our family. Also, we make the household together. Everybody does something like doing the hoovering, doing the dishes or mowing the lawn. Besides we have got 4 other family members namely two dogs and two rabbits.
In my free time I do a lot of sport, almost daily. I play in the local football club, ride my mountain bike and run often. But sometimes I don’t do sports, so I undertake something with my friends, like going to the cinema, read a book or relax in my room with some music in the background or I make music by myself, with a piano. In addition, I’m a member of the youth fire brigade for 5 years now, in which I was chosen to the youth speaker in 2009.

In our high school, I’m a learning assistant. Learning assistants help younger students with their homework in their free time. Besides I was altar server for 3 years in our local church.

I hope that I will see you soon in America and I hope to pass a splendid time in your country!

Greetings from Monschau in Germany, Your

Sascha

Danke im vorraus :slight_smile:

Hallo Sascha!
Zunächst einmal: für den Anfang ist der Brief schon gar nicht schlecht, aber versuche Dir doch bitte einmal vorzustellen, aufgrund dieses Briefes soll eine Familie Dich für ein ganzes Jahr bei sich aufnehmen! Und da musst Du schon etwas persönlicher werden; Deine Interessen (jetzt sage bitte nicht, Du hast nicht mehr…), Dein täglicher Tagesablauf, was machen Deine Eltern, was ist Dir wichtig, wovor drückst Du Dich zu Hause…usw. Einige Orgas geben sogar Empfehlungen, wie lang dieser Brief werden soll und da ist Deiner etwas zu kurz geraten. Auf ein Neues!

Danke schonmal, ich überarbeite ihn nochmal und stell ihn dann nochmal rein :wink:

Dear host family,
First of all, I want to thank you for welcoming me in your family and for giving me the chance to have a look into the American way of life, to learn more about American lifestyle, your culture and of course, your language!

My name is Sascha Schell. I’m 16 years old and I live in a historical and touristical town called Monschau situated in North Rhine-Westphalia (near Aix-la-Chapelle) in the western part of Germany, near Belgium and the Netherlands. Monschau is an old medieval town with lots of restaurants, hotels and wonderful old houses made in wooden truss. A town almost visited by American, European and even Asian people.
Spending a year in America has been my dream for many years, since an informative meeting at our school about highschool years happened. At this, I heard some field reports from former highschool year students and I was very fascinated of everything they talked about. Back home, I looked for other field reports and information about the USA in the internet and in some encyclopedias. Now, I’m very fascinated of the country and I want to get to know more about the culture there. I’m looking forward to try new things and making experiences for my life. I want to become more self-confident and self-employed. But I’m also a little bit nervous, because I never had been away from home ten month. The longest time, I was away from home, was two weeks with my friends in Greece, but I’m very confident and pleased about that experience.
To get to know me better I am going to tell you something about me, my family and my life in Germany:
I am 1.84 m tall and as you can see at the photo I have red hair and green eyes. I’m an open-minded and happy young man, who can integrate well and quickly get to know new people. I like to work in a team and to undertake something with a few people, but I also like to be independent sometimes and I really have my own opinion. At the moment I visit the ninth grade of the Sankt Michael Gymnasium, a highschool in my town. My favorite subjects are English, school sport, art and French.
I live with my family in a nice house with a big garden with a wonderful view at the “Monschau-valley”, all together with my 41 years old father who is manager for eleven years now in his own little family hotel, which belonged earlier to my grand-parents for 40 years long. My mother is 38 years old and is housewife for the moment and helps sometimes in our hotel. My 19 years old brother does an education for metalworker and my 6 years old sister is in grade 2 at the basic school.

We all have a close relationship. If someone has a problem he can talk to everyone of our family. Also, we make the household together. Everybody does something like doing the hoovering, doing the dishes or mowing the lawn. Besides we have got 4 other family members namely two dogs and two rabbits.
In my free time I do a lot of sport, almost daily. I play in the local football club, ride my mountain bike and run often. But sometimes I don’t do sports, so I undertake something with my friends, like going to the cinema, read a book or relax in my room with some music in the background or I make music by myself, with a piano. In addition, I’m a member of the youth fire brigade for 5 years now, in which I was chosen to the youth speaker in 2009. In our high school, I’m a learning assistant. Learning assistants help younger students with their homework in their free time. Besides I was altar server for 3 years in our local church.

I hope that I will see you soon in America and I hope to pass a splendid time in your country!
Greetings from Monschau in Germany, Your

Sascha